It’s Been A While: Reflect

Well folks,

        It’s been a while. I’ve finally made the switch to wordpress and I am very happy with it! I’ve added a ‘Creativity & Expression’ page for things like music, pictures, etc. that I feel like sharing!

Now on to the juicy stuff…

        I wish I could say my journey has been going smoothly, but it has not. I feel almost as if I am right where I started, but I know I’m not. School started and I fell back into a familiar and unsatisfying routine. I stopped meditating, I stopped doing yoga, I stopped eating healthy… In short I started living my life for other people again instead of living life for myself.

        It has been a very crazy first semester. I have been too busy and way too stressed. It was getting to the point where I was completely furious with myself. I had new prespectives because of the journey I started over the summer and I couldn’t believe I let myself fall into a situation where I felt cornered and unhappy.

        Mostly I am angry. How could I claim to be taking control of my life? How could I say I was aware and responsible? When I so willingly let myself start living a lifestyle I wasn’t completely passionate about.

Its exhausting to think about.

        So now I am at the point where I remind myself and you, that we have control and responsibility over our lives. And right now that means taking responsibility for the fact that no one else put me in this situation but myself. Sure I could be bitter and blame every Tom, Jack and Harry because I was living my life more concerned with their needs and happiness, but that would just be an unhealthy waste of time.

        So I’m taking a deep breath… and I am feeling empowered because now that I assume responsibility, it means I can change this.

        As I switched all my old posts from blogspot to wordpress I read through them and felt happy. I felt reconnected with the life I had been living in the summer. I felt alive and passionate about my life and my choices.

       So, my advice today is to be aware of your unhappiness and make the time to reflect and make changes. Because although I slipped into old unsatisfying routines, I am still passionate about the life I want and I still have the drive.
Knowing the mistakes I made this semester will make next semester that much easier to conquer.

On a happier much lighter note, I have booked my auditions for Theatre. SO EXCITED!!!

Tori J Wilcox


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